Spring beauty

Don’t we all agree that spring is the most charming time of the year? Everything is changing outside, like literally. The birds don’t stop singing and the flowers don’t stop blooming. Circle of life. This specific type of fresh air will give you some sense of hope, motivation and energy to do more and be more. Everything seems to be more bearable. Are you one those people who feel this way? Good for you.

There is nothing more annoying than a sudden weather movement from 2°C and winter clothes to 18°C and bam. You’re sweating like a little piggy because you have no clue how to properly choose clothes. “It’s impossible to be this hot outside”. Nope. It actually is hot outside. And yesterday wasn’t.

Have I mentioned mood switching? You are feeling this empowering and inspirational batch of air few times a day. Almost everything becomes more colorful and so does your reality and dreams. For a moment you are positive thinking guru. Relatable? Of course. Too bad you can’t maintain it for the whole year. Your mind needs to bloom whatever your yard is or isn’t.

It’s also such a delightful time for allergic folks. The struggle is real and painful. You are flying on tissues, you haven’t slept for days and everything gets only more and more intense. It’s questionable what is really driving you forward but hey, spring is around, so you better be happy. Otherwise, the general picture is broken.

In the end, everything is mixing and you are just transforming into overwhelmingly mind blooming piggy drifting on the stunning meadow with tissues sucking the life out of you. Smile you rainbow throwing zombie, smile!

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Small talks

This is daily mush up of mine. Dealing with people and then overthinking it. That’s how I cope. Much fun.

Sometimes we are all small talking, especially with somebody we barely know or don’t know at all. It can happen anywhere, most likely in our workplaces. We are doing it because we want to be nice, funny or sometimes just to fill the silence. Is it always so necessary?

I came to realize that nothing good comes out of the small talks. I see how people are struggling to be awesome and in the end, they are just pretending to be somebody else. Someone ultra funny with the best stories or someone faking to care at all. Why is it hard sometimes and why silence scare people so much? Since when you are suddenly weird by not commenting random and mostly unrelevant stuff? As usual, I’m asking questions I can’t possibly answer.

For me it’s simple: when I don’t want to talk I don’t talk but when I do, you can be more than assured that you have my full attention and care. I’m more than fine with silence – observing others is funnier. This weird pursuit of everyone’s sympathy by being “vocally active” makes me feel quite confused. I don’t understand it. You can’t make people like you or see you more. Besides that, isn’t it way more interesting to talk about something that really matters?

I don’t have enough of energy (or rather patience) to enjoy small talking and I’ll be damned if I’m the only one thinking this way.

Non-roomies

I think we all have at least one funny story to tell about our former or actual roommate. As I remember correctly I got to move 7 times meeting approximately 15 new people. I lived in the dormitory twice but that’s a whole other experience. Anyway, here are some facts I had the joy to witness.

  1. Appreciation is tabu.

No matter how long or hard I’ve tried to clean our common spaces like kitchen or bathroom – magic happened! Half an hour and the place was dirty again. Usually, when I confronted them, all I’ve been hearing was some lousy excuses or even accusations. The truth is when somebody is ok with the dirtiness and tons of dust, there is nothing you can possibly do to change it. Bad luck. At some point, I simply gave up and I was cleaning only after myself.

  1. Untidiness gets a new meaning.

Towels on shoes? Big piles of unfresh clothes at every possible angle? Bunch of trash on the floor? Another bunch of dirty dishes with unfinished, old and stinky food? Garbage bag full of old stuff that nobody “was able” to take out? The sink full of used dishes that are yours and nobody cleaned them after using? Kitchen dirty to this point that you don’t have space or tools to cook? Boi oh boi just imagine the general smell.

  1. Redefining bravery is on the daily basic.

I had a bunch of difficult and humiliating conversations about the fact that somebody was leaving brown marks in the toilet or piss was all over the place. Seriously? Mama didn’t teach you how to properly handle your business? Or how to clean the sink after you put 30 kg of make-up on you and now it’s everywhere? Or those hairs that you leaving in the bathtub? It’s disgusting. It’s also not easy to talk about it. Again, if people don’t know very basic stuff like this, there is absolutely nothing you can do. I’ve learned it the hard way.

  1. Other lives coexist with you.

I remember until this day the size of spider that came out of the closet. Holy cow. It was as big as my fist. When I was living in Italy I came upon a dead scorpion. Oh yes! Because of the moist, a lot of stuff was also covered with mold within a night. Enjoying living on 12 floor? Just acknowledge the cockroaches and other tiny things that like to travel on the pipes. My roommate denied their existence and they spread even more. Believe me, there is nothing more horrible than a battle with cockroaches.

  1. Noise tolerance has a new scale.

Eh, that’s a tricky one. There is nothing wrong with listening to music as long as you’re not doing it at 5 am. Same goes for inviting people over in the middle of the night. Really? Also, you don’t have to do the dishes at 6 am when everyone is still asleep. Showing off should be dedicated to other things.

The rule is easy: clean after yourself and don’t bother others while doing it.

Szczury, lisiory i inne stwory

Nawet nie wiem od czego zacząć. Są takie sytuacje, że obserwuję i nie wiem co mam myśleć. Są to również jedne z tych chwil, w których pierwsze co przychodzi do głowy jest nasze piękne polskie słownictwo, bardzo adekwatne do okoliczności. Och, możliwości uzewnętrznienia się są wręcz wyborne.

Stoję w kolejce po kurczaka i 6 plasterków salami. Przychodzi moja kolej a tu znienacka starsza Pani, wpycha się bezczelnie jakby nic ją nie obowiązywało. Miałam dobry humor, odpuściłam. W głowie tylko “eh, typowy syndrom paweła”. Dumny paw, ma wszystko w… piórach. Jak ja uwielbiam je czasem wyrywać!

Jestem w pracy. Wyrabiam normy, robię swoje, czasem się nawet udzielam. Czego nie lubię? Podlizywania się, nachalności, egoizmu i braku jakiejkolwiek logiki. Byle szybko, byle ja. Ja! Ja jestem najlepszy. Brzmi znajomo? Witam cię szczurobiurwie.

Wchodzę do pociągu Intercity. Każdy ma obowiązek wykupienia miejsca. Wiara wpycha się do wagonu, jakby rozdawali nagrody, że kto pierwszy. W efekcie korytarze są pozapychane i każdy irytuje się, że co tak długo. Czyż nie cebule?

Idę do pączkarni. Jest 5 ostatnich sztuk mojego ulubionego nadzienia. Zastanawiając się, weszła babeczka, prawie biegiem i krzykiem oznajmia przede mną, że chce całe 5 pączków. Kpina. Co za lisiorstwo. A bądź sobie nawet i grubym liskiem. Zachłanność nigdy nie popłaca.

Zmierzam ku bibliotece. Mam ochotę poczytać coś z science-fiction. Pytam się Pani bibliotekarki co fajnego poleca, po czym otrzymuję odpowiedź: “dział science-fiction jest po prawo”. Aha. Ktoś tu chyba jest za karę, Pani uszczypliwa szczypiornico.

Czekam za Panem lekarzem. Jako, że wysłano mnie z medycyny pracy, mam pierwszeństwo. Jest to także napisane na drzwiach do gabinetu. To jest moi drodzy środowisko piejących szczekaczy. Jak to jest możliwe, że ja jestem pierwsza jak to on ma numer jeden w kolejce? Tak to, a teraz cicho.

Dzwonię, aby zapytać o sprawę, która nie jest klarownie wyjaśniona w internecie. Po 10 godzinach oczekiwania oraz 4 przekierowaniach dostaję odpowiedź “proszę sprawdzić na stronie”. Opowiadam o co chodzi: “to niemożliwe”. Pytam: “więc co jest możliwe?” Odpowiedzi nie uzyskałam. Eh, te kameleony. Głośne to, a ile jeszcze w dodatku udaje, że się na czymś zna.

Jestem świadkiem kłótni relacji matka – 5-10letnie dziecko. Jak to dziecko, chciało batonika. Mama nie pozwoliła. Krzyków nie było końca. W końcu mama nie wytrzymała, żyłka pękła i tym piekielnym głosem: “ty materialistko jedna! nic ci nie kupię, rozumiesz?”. Czy trzeba aż tak po diabelsku? Buractwem się spraw nie załatwia. Tym bardziej z dziećmi.

Nosz kurka wodna, ileż tego jest.

Fake times

I came to realize that a lot of people are kind of fake. Not only in my or my closest ones surrounding but also on TV and how it’s brainwashing a lot of us. So what and why it’s happening?

– People are desperate to be cool or seen as easy going. No? Miss one party or don’t agree with something and you will experience what it means to be an outsider. Bah, be sarcastic and nobody will understand you (story of my life).

– People are pursuing to be ultra fit. There is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself as long as you don’t brag around about every step you take. Nobody cares what you ate or what kind of exercise did you do. Just enjoy the damn food. “I’m fit” “I’m vegan” Yeah right. In most cases, they have no clue what to eat not to mention they have absolutely nothing to do with sport. Few weeks without meat and one fitness course doesn’t make you an expert. Commit and then we will talk.

– People tend to overdo. Too much make up and too much of everything. Again, there is nothing wrong with looking nice and attractive as long as 60% of your face is in fact…your face. Not fake eyelashes, not corrected eyebrows, not 1cm of coverage. The tendency to look like that every day, eh please. You will look different, but it doesn’t mean more beautiful.

– People’s appearances on social media are far away from the truth. Mostly they are pretending to be somebody else. You travel? Do you have a baby? You just got married? You just went out with your colleagues? Few joyful events don’t make you happy. It’s like ego feeding – desperate for another approval, like “look I’m better than you”. No, you’re not.

– People don’t commit or care anymore. Look at the divorce rates. Somehow the meaning of love and marriage had changed. Friendships mean nothing. As long as you suitable you are ok. How many times do you feel annoyed because you went out with your pals and everyone seemed to be more interested in their phones then how you are doing? How many times did you do that yourself?

I could probably go on and on with this. A lot of things are constantly surprising me and I don’t understand anything. What’s more important: I refuse to follow it. Do you?

5 Gründe, warum man nie fehlerfreies Deutsch sprechen wird

*Bitte beachte, dass dieser Beitrag nur Spaß ist. Es ist einfach ein Scherz. Es passiert nicht für alle Ausländer. Aber es kann.

  1. Deutschland ist voll mit Dialekten.

Na ja. Die Leuten von Nord werden nicht mit den Leuten von Süd kommunizieren. Es gibt Sachsen und Bayern. Da spricht man fast eine andere Sprache. Es gibt Hochdeutsch und Plattdeutsch. Es gibt lustige Worte in allen Städten. Es gibt alles auf einmal.

  1. Du wird immer jemanden mit einem starken Akzent treffen.

Jedes mal, wenn du selbstbewusst mit deine Deutschkenntnissen bist – wirst du jemanden treffen, der es ändern wird. Jedes verdammt mal. Sprichst du Deutsch? Super! Was für ein Deutsch? Woher kommst du? Es ist alles kompliziert.

  1. Fast niemand benutzt die einfachen Wörter.

Wofür? Es gibt viele Wege etwas zu erklären. Bei vielen Wegen meine ich sehr viele Wege. Vor allem Worte, die man nicht übersetzen kann. Natürlich ist es gut und macht diese Sprache interessant. Es ist aber nicht einfacher für die Ausländer.

  1. Grammatik wird einem Kopfschmerzen geben

Der, die oder das? Wähle bitte, das weiß man nicht genau. Gibt es auch zweimal, wenn du möchtest. Deutsche Grammatik ist vielleicht nicht so schwer aber speziell. Man muss viel üben. Für viele Leute ist es der erste Grund Deutsch nicht weiter zu lernen. Alles kommt mit der Zeit meine Lieben.

  1. Der Fehler ist dein neuer Freund

Versuch mal gut zu sprechen und dann…versuch noch einmal, weil du einen Fehler gemacht hast. Hast du es nicht bemerkt? Es ist normal. Vielen Fehler machen ist in Deutsch normal. Es kann deine Muttersprache sein und du machst Fehler oder denkst über “wie soll ich es sagen” ein bisschen zu lange nach.

Die meisten Sprachschulen vorbereiten nicht gut. Ich habe Deutsch für 6 Jahre gelernt und danach hatte ich Problemen mit jemandem zu kommunizieren. Warum? Ich habe zu viel Mist gelernt, den ich jetzt gar nicht benutze.

Alle diese Gründen zeigen Deutsch als eine einzigartige und ein bisschen seltsame Sprache. Es ist nur mein Erfahrung. Keine Sorge. Mach einfach weiter. Viel Spaß und…Glück!

Positive vibes

I’ve been recently struggling with staying positive. It got me thinking (of course) about how to handle this state of mind. I don’t mean being unhappy or happy. For me, being positive means you are strong enough to believe that everything will be ok because you know yourself, your dreams and your capabilities. Regardless of the current situation. Are you positive? I’m certainly trying to.

It’s very easy to lose your motivation or ability to overcome even a tiny negativity. We live in the world full of opportunities but also hollowness and fake behaviors. Look at the social media or typical commercials. Everyone achieved more than you and possessed more then you will ever have. We are overwhelmed. It’s hard to focus on your goals and just simply get going. Distraction is on every damn corner.

I think what really matters is the right attitude. That’s a valuable skill to have. I don’t even know what’s called: being realistic mixed with cautiousness? Being able not to worry mixed with hope? Being stubborn mixed with confidence? All I know is having this specific attitude helps with staying positive.

Carry on with whatever you’re doing. A bad day is in the end just a bad day.*

 

*no, I’m not a personal couch and I don’t blab around. It’s just a regular utter mush up of mine.